it was quite fascinating to realise that this was still possible for me, after not having confided in someone for quite some time.

with the added fact that this person has never really been all that close to me, considering how often we've been working together.

my friend also realised that this was the first time we really got to talk to each other, about things other than the one we both had the corners of our minds focused upon.

it really made me think, though, about how before all this, of all the people I've been working with for about 3/4 of a year now, I only recognised two or three people, was able to put a face to the names that i saw for another two or three, and as for the rest I was left wondering if i'd been absent from school for an extended period of time that made me never see or hear of them before.

fair enough, i suppose lying low hasn't served me much good since i still don't really know the rest of the committee, but on the other hand i suppose i don't make friends as easily as everyone who knows me thinks.

and perhaps something about me has changed since the first semester... the thing that has made me turn inward to myself (much to the dissent and annoyance of my mind and regular instincts), resulting in a twisted conflict between mind, heart and body that ended up wearing me thin (in all ways except literally, what a pity).

but that's not the point at all, is it?

the point is how surprised i was at the ease that I had in talking to this friend of mine.

and i guess all this has made me think about how (especially in University), work drives people together.

I think of all the people that i've met because of work or projects, all the friends i've made and gotten to know better from group assignments or long-term projects or tutorial groups. they actually add up to a substantial percentage of the people i've gotten to know in University since last August.

and it's through the slogging, toiling, slaving over late nights and four-hour-long discussions and poorly-attended meetings that we bond.

in our common purpose and direction: simply the desire to finish this, and to do it as well as we possibly can muster with our tired bodies and minds sapped of youthful energy we're all supposedly known for and assumed to have.

constantly working, and never losing sight of that shiny, elusive A that would reward and affirm our efforts completely.

strange, isn't it?
how competition can be so compelling.
then again, maybe not.